Clutter and Grief
If clearing clutter has been a big challenge in your life, you might be feeling resistant to change.
Change in general is often accompanied by some sort of loss. It can be difficult to let go of clutter that reminds us of happy memories or loved ones. However, loss is a natural part of clearing clutter, and it can take courage to release it when it is truly time to do so.
Every time you decide to let go of something, you have changed into a slightly different person. A piece of the old you that held onto your clutter (and the plans you had for it) have "died." This can be painful, but like all grief, moving through it is essential for joy.
Processing thoughts related to loss can lead us from denial (the first stage of grief) through a variety of emotions, and ultimately to acceptance.
GRIEVING YOUR CLUTTER EXERCISE:
Pick an item that is blocking your space the most.
Now choose from the list below. What technique appeals to you most for processing these feelings about letting go of clutter?
Write:
Journal
Write a personal essay
Write a poem
Perform:
Dance to express what’s within
Sing your heart out
Act out your feelings
Play an instrument
Do a stand up comedy bit
Make Art:
Draw
Make a collage
Pain
Sculpt
Talk:
Record your voice
Find a good listener
When you are in a safe space, look at your most obstructive clutter item. Imagine that it is no longer in your life.
If this image brings up strong emotions or physical discomfort, spend at least 5 minutes writing, performing, making art, or talking about your inner experience.
Some common feelings that may come up are:
Fear
Frustration
Anger
Disgust
Confusion
Apathy
Agitation
Embarrassment
Fatigue
Pain
Sadness
Anxiety
Vulnerability
Longing
Notice how you feel now.
ACCEPTANCE:
Have you fully accepted that you need to clear this item of clutter?
It’s important to learn to tolerate the empty space that remains. When the clutter is gone, many experience the impulse to fill the space back up, because doing so restores familiarity. However, new-found space is not an empty void that needs to be filled, but rather something in which to luxuriate.
READY TO LET GO?:
When you are ready to release the clutter item, put it in a bag or box and put it on your curb, or even the trash if you are overwhelmed by the latter. You may even experience the sensation of a great weight being lifted from your spirit once the items are gone.
If you’re not ready, continue processing your emotions related to the item.
Don’t give up on your dream of a life free from clutter. I offer virtual coaching if you need someone with specialized training. I am Certified as a Life Coach and can help with many of the deeper issues. Find me on the Grief Support Center directory.
Disclaimer: This post is not meant to diagnose or treat any mental health challenges. Please seek out any help you need with a professional.
